|Grandma Walker and Justin|
I wish you could have met my Grandma Walker. If you are reading this and you already knew her, you know what I'm talking about. She was truly the nicest, most wonderful human being I have ever known. I truly think of her every single day and if someone were to ask me what my goals in life are, one of them is to be as loving and kind as she was.
I fall short of that goal on many days. But it's something to work towards.
Grandma Walker was mother to four, grandmother and great grandmother to many. She always had time to listen and she made world-famous blackberry cobblers. She loved strawberries and Jesus. It wasn't until she died and it was written in her obituary that I learned she had been a member of her church for 60 years. Sixty years! That really impressed me. She walked the walk. I never heard her preach anything about what she was learning in church. She loved you no matter what mistakes you may have made in your life, and she never spoke an unkind word about anyone. I miss her terribly as I know all our family does.
The last time I was in Grand Ronde a couple of years ago, one of my aunts handed me a ziploc baggie full of photos they had saved for me after they went through her things. Grandma had kept all the letters I had written to her and they came back to me. I really treasure those things. I just ran across them last weekend while going through a box of stuff.
When grandma died, I was stunned. I'm not very good at processing death. Everyone has a different path when it comes to grieving. Mine is usually delayed. Her death was no different. I kind of put mourning her death up on a shelf. But, on our first trip to Oregon after she died, Gene and I had stopped at a little mom & pop cafe for a coffee break. Gene went to wash his hands and as I looked up on the menu board, I noticed their special was home-made blackberry cobbler. Gulp. By the time Gene got back to the table, I was a mess. I had not given any thought about going back to Oregon and not having grandma there. If she knew we were coming, she would always make a blackberry cobbler as she knew it was our very favorite. There would be no blackberry cobbler waiting for us. Grieving is like that sometimes. It finds you when you least expect it. I've experienced it too many times to try to deny it.
I want to leave this post on a happy note. Grandma Walker left behind real, honest to goodness goodness in her family. I see it when I read my aunts and cousins post on FB. Even though she is gone, I see and hear her in my family. We're connected that way. I'd bet my last paycheck I'm not the only one who longs to be just like her.