I'm up early today. I set the alarm for 5:00 a.m. but I turned it off at 4:45 a.m. because I was ready to roll out of bed. I've been really achy lately. It seems like if I keep moving, I don't ache but once I sit down or lay down to sleep, everything hurts.
I was talking with a couple of my gal pals yesterday while we were out motorcycling. I was telling them that I am really wrestling with the changes my body is going through getting older and, well, I tried to have a little pity party but they would have none of it. I love that. Instead, they gave me a short pep talk and said, "oh, girl, this is the best time of your life! This is harvest time!"
I thought a lot about that as I was riding yesterday and I must have gone to bed thinking about it because I got up and got moving this morning. I've washed two loads of laundry, took the dog for her 2-mile walk, visited the grocery store and had my bowl of oatmeal. It's only 8:30 a.m. as I write this.
The truth: I'm packing around an extra 30 lbs. of fat and it is driving me crazy. I'm pretty sure when (not if) I get this weight gone, I'm going to feel better. How could I not? Ugh. Everything is such an effort. I can't even believe I'm posting this photo here but I put it out on FB last night as I had some great pics of my friends I wanted to share.
I cannot hide the fact I have gained far too much weight. No freaking wonder I don't feel good.
Last week, we visited an antique store when we were in Prosser. There was an older woman there who I think is the owner of the store. She was sitting laying in a lazy-boy recliner and it was obvious she didn't move much from that chair. I could really see myself in that position someday as the more weight I gain, the harder and harder it is to move. One just feels like a slug. I need to keep moving.
So, I'm not going to make any crazy promises or big plan to lose 30 lbs. in 30 days or anything like that. I know what I need to do it. I just need to do it.
Thanks to my friends Jan and Dorothy for the words of encouragement. The words mean so much to me.
I gotta go now and cross some more things off my to-do list. One of the things not on my to-do list is self-loathing. It's not helpful. I need to stop doing that and get into physical action.
love, susan
When you figure out how to stop that,(the self loathing)you let me know ya hear??? Kathy
ReplyDeleteI used to have a 26" waist. As I aged, the waist grew in number too. I hate my stomach... I hate how large my waistline has become. The rest of me has increased too, but the waistline bugs me the most. I miss that flat stomach I used to have when I was in my 30s and even into my early 40s. Now I'm 50-something and I don't even remember what it was like to see my rib cage.
ReplyDeleteI totally *get this*. I totally get the feelings of self-loathing when it comes to the way our bodies change with age. I'm walking too... a lot. It may not lead to a flat stomach, but it does make me feel better for getting out there and moving.
Who knows how long we'll be able to move comfortably? Someday we may need a walker to get around. Someday we may need a cane. Someday, we may not be able to get up and walk at all. So I will enjoy my walks - even if they don't result in a flat stomach. I will savor my time in the sunshine... enjoying what is around me and being grateful for mobility.
You are beautiful. We are all beautiful. That's what I tell myself, and you know - sometimes it works. I am so thankful that I can walk. I am so thankful that I can get around my neighborhood. I am so thankful that I can walk a hiking trail with my dog.
I'll gladly deal with the round belly. It's the least of my concerns.
By the same token.. I sure hope these 2-3 mile walks can give me a TINY glimpse of a rib. That would be awesome! LOL
Thank you for your encouragement, Susan. It means a lot to me!!
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