Holding Space for Others

 

Yesterday was a full day. One of the women in a big circle of friends I see on a regular basis had written on FB that she wanted to start a book club in 2019. A couple of mutual friends jumped on that and we had our second meeting yesterday. The starter of the group wasn't able to attend but those who could show up, showed up. I've learned a lot about group dynamics over the years and it is something that has been on my mind a lot lately due to several circumstances that have happened over the last year. I am an observer and a thinker. Bottom line is that we had a great conversation about the book we're reading this month called Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis. One person skipped a couple of chapters, one person quit reading this book altogether, and another just didn't have time to read more a couple chapters. I'm not here to review the book. But, some interesting thoughts bubbled up while deep in conversation with my women friends yesterday that I want to share.

 

Writer's Grace I admitted to the group that I DID NOT want to read this book when they announced it was the chosen one.  I read it anyway and was pleasantly surprised that I found things I could relate to. I decided to read this book with what I dub writer's grace. People, it's fucking hard to write a book. This book is her story. Who am I to judge her? I changed my attitude and I believe it helped me get through it with the most open mind I could muster. In the end, I thought it was slightly sugar coated but as we discussed in book club, publishing a book is difficult and there is such a thing as a target audience (tribe). I am not her tribe but I managed to find something to take away from her experience and honor her efforts. Isn't that what we're here for?

 

Take What You Want, Leave the Rest This is a cliché that has served me well for lots of years now. I feel like everyone I cross paths with has something to teach me. Sometimes it is a characteristic that I want to study more, or it's a behavior I find appalling and I strive to "not be that way". It doesn't matter, I embrace it all and feel like every day I am in this huge classroom with y'all. Besides coming together to talk about the book, I was impressed with the commitment the other women in this newly formed club made to show up at 9am on a Saturday morning for coffee. Holding space means a lot to me and apparently to others.

 

Encouraging Other Writers Turns out one of the women in the book club is a writer. She's been trying to get back to a manuscript she has in the bag, so we talked about encouraging each other. Just that simple interaction prompted me to keep a few notes in my memo app so I could write this today.

 

BONUS YESTERDAY: After book club, I photographed this beautiful German Shepherd rescue and then I went on a photo walk in the afternoon with my photo buddy. We went in search of American Bald Eagles and we were not disappointed when we came upon a mature and juvenile eagle sitting together. It was gift from the universe!

 

After all this, a friend gave birth to her baby late in the day. I received a photo of her beautiful baby girl and I couldn't help but think the day was maybe the best one I've had in a very long time. If every day was like yesterday, I might die from over-happiness. It was right up there on the scale!

 

DO YOU HOLD SPACE FOR OTHERS? Do you go into it with expectations, or do you wait to see how it is all going to turn out? Do you ever read a book you don't really want to and later decide you're glad you didn't count it out? What are you reading right now?  Talk to me!

 

love, susan