Funny how some things trigger memories.
I was cleaning the stairs today and couldn't shake the dejavu. I've been here before. Cleaning stairs. Not these stairs, although I have cleaned these ones a few times.
When I was in high school, we lived in a great old two-story house that my folks rented for $100 a month. My sister and I had our own bedrooms. Mine was always a horrible mess, hers was immaculate. I hated cleaning then as much as I hate it now. Mom would just tell me to keep my door closed so she didn't have to look at it. It was the topic of conversation with relatives. Such a shameful example of a girl. Lazy slob.
We had assigned chores which included setting the table, washing and drying dinner dishes, cleaning two bathrooms and dusting and polishing the stairs. My sister always did her chores right on time but I dragged mine out as long as I could, resenting every moment of it. I had better things to do. I still feel that way. I resent doing housework.
There, I said it.
While I was cleaning the stairs today,
I remembered those wood stairs from 1975.
And, how I felt.
That was a long time ago.
Last week, someone posted a question up on FB. What is one thing you would tell your 12 year old self? I couldn't think of a thing until today. I would tell her that her mom was full of shit when she said "no man will ever have you because you are such a lousy housekeeper." I'd tell her that her mom hated housework just as much as she does and her mom is only making her to do it because she's tired from working a 40 hour work week, shopping, cleaning, paying bills, checking homework, laundry, making dinner and all the other million things real women do. I'd tell her to get used to people stereotyping women. I'd tell her that when she grows up, things are not always going to be fair and that people are still going to stereotype her. I'd tell her that expectations are a set up for resentment. I'd tell her it's perfectly okay if she'd rather be doing anything but housework. I'd tell her that if someone only "wants" her for her domestic skills, she might wanna think about going it alone. I'd tell her it's not nice to call someone lazy.
Words spoken are hard to take back. I've all but taken the word lazy out of my vocabulary.
Have things changed much since 1975? Not really. I rarely dust. I clean my oven maybe once a year. I just ordered new reflector pans for the stove top because they are so ugly they are beyond cleaning. It's been two weeks since I changed my sheets.
Go ahead, judge me.
.... this is just a bit of my truth. Dude, I'm just getting started.