Goodbye Melissa, You Were Significant

Sad day.  My friend "T" and I went for our Tuesday night coffee and discovered our favorite barrista is leaving us. Seems she is going off to college in Oklahoma.  The nerve of her.

Significant? 

Well, yes. 

Melissa started making our coffees sometime last year. We didn't really notice that she remembered us coming in every Tuesday until we missed a couple of Tuesdays. She mentioned it when we did return and I think that is significant.

So we asked her what her name is and made a commitment to remember her name each Tuesday.  We received the best customer service in the TriCities!

Last night there was a new girl at the counter. She never made eye contact, didn't smile, didn't act excited to see us. What the hell?  I kindly said, "where is Melissa?"  Out of the back I hear her say, "I'm here"!  She had just seriously burned her hand and couldn't work. After a little exchange, she said she is leaving on Friday to get a higher education.  Good for her. Bad for us.

So, I ask the grumpy girl what her name is.  Honestly, I cannot remember what she said.

Wanna make a great impression on someone? 

Make eye contact.

Care enough to give a smile.

Be present.

Just sayin'.

Do you have a favorite significant barrista or hair stylist or nurse? 

Are you being significant? Tell me about it!

love, susan

1,000 Miles

Another trip under our belts this weekend. We took off right after work Thursday and stayed overnight in Salem. We decided to take a different path to our destination, heading over towards the coast instead of taking I-5. We had nothing but time.

 

Due to a country music festival (Read: Brad Paisley, Dirks Bentley and Eric Church) near Bandon this weekend, and my procrastination in getting a room reserved near our family, we stayed in Coos Bay, which is an hour from our family's place in Port Orford. I have a high school friend who moved to Coos Bay last year so I did  not mind staying there at all as we got to have breakfast with her Saturday morn. What a joy to catch up with her! I've noticed things always work out the way they are supposed to. Leaving Sunday morning from Coos Bay shaved an hour off an otherwise 10 hour driving day. It all matters.

 

At Cape Arago

The family reunion was wonderful and although it is a long 500 miles to get there, the road weariness drops away the very moment I see my cousins! We're lucky they have opted to host the gathering every year on their property. One of my cousins is married to a fisherman and you know what that means, right?  Fish fry!

 

This year they added oysters to the table. My husband never quit smiling and I'm pretty sure he had his yearly quota of the slimy stuff this weekend. I saw the guys eating them for breakfast. Whattup with that?  

 

While some of my favorite cousins (I'm not naming names!) were not there this year, I got to meet some new family. My cousin G's longtime lady is very sweet and she has the most awesome border collie ever! I spent most of Saturday throwing a ball for her. There were also some of the most super cute kids with the best manners I've seen in a long time.

 

I got to ride in the back of a Ford pickup truck with the kids as we headed to the beach for some fun time. Skipper, the other border collie, rode in the back with me and for a minute I was 13 again.  You can't buy that!

 

I hope wherever you are that you had a great weekend.

 

love, susan

 

 

Best Forever Friends (Part 2)

ON FRIENDS
Some time ago I wrote a post on best forever friends. Before this summer is over, I will have seen quite a few friends and family from my past. 

At the end of this week, I'll be sharing a cup of coffee with a woman who was one of my very best friends in high school. We've kept in touch by email and FB over the years. I cannot remember the last time I saw her in person. She happens to now live in the little coast town where we'll be staying for my cousins' reunion. How lucky am I? 

ROAD TRIPS
In September, another high school BFF is flying from Juneau directly into our itty bitty airport where I'll pick her up and we'll be taking a road trip to Montana to spend a couple days with another friend we haven't seen in many moons. I haven't seen my Juneau friend since her wedding day 12 1/2 years ago. I'm super excited to see her and the road trip is like a big, fat cherry on top. It won't be the first road trip we've taken together. When I lived in Alaska, we traveled from Anchorage (or was it Fairbanks?) to a gold mine where another high school friend was living and working. I had never been to a gold mine before so besides seeing our school mate, it was an exciting adventure. I've since lost the photos from that trip. Darn it.

WHAT DO YOU DO
What prompted this post is that recently my step daughter was talking about missing her class reunion. She still lives in the same town where she graduated. Even so, she didn't recognize most of the names of people she graduated with. She has a handful of good friends she has kept up with and spends time with on a regular basis. She has been a shining example to me of how to keep those friendships alive. We decided attending a class reunion is a lot about comparing notes on our station in life. Who needs that?

FRIENDS REALLY ARE THE FLOWERS IN LIFE
I never expected that I would stay in touch with old friends so long. I moved away from my little hometown where I graduated from high school and pretty much never looked back. Not to get all gushy but friends really are the flowers in my life. I have a big field of them and each one is special. I don't really care much what they do for a living, I am far more interested in how they are living. 

Have you reconnected with anyone lately? I'd love to hear about it!

love, susan

Top 10 Things I Love About Today

I recently heard someone say that they always end their workday by coming through the door and telling their loved one the best thing about the day. Yesterday when I got in the car, he asked me what the best part of my day was and I said, "right now".  

Today, I'll try to be a little more specific.

TOP 10 THINGS I LOVE ABOUT TODAY (so far)

• It's Tuesday.
• The a/c is working well in my office. Not so much at home.
• I remembered to bring protein for lunch. 
• I also remembered some fresh pineapple leftover from the weekend for my lunch.
• Nobody has yelled at me yet today.
• Remi escaped from the front door this morning while I was walking the other dogs. She found us half-way up the block. Dumb dog. Oops. That's kinda negative.
• It's almost 1:00pm as I write this, which means half my work day is complete. Love that!
• My housekeeper is going to reschedule with me since the a/c is not working. Love that woman.
• I got a couple of texts from my friend who is traveling in Utah today.
• I have 10 things to be happy about ... see above.

It's easy to name the negatives.  If you don't think so, just try naming 10 Things You Love About Today and leave it in my comments.  

love, susan

Snapping Out of It!

I'm in a slump today. It comes in waves much like fluffy white clouds passing through an otherwise perfectly sunny day.  You know the kind I'm talking about. The bright, Clorox bleached white  clouds that pass by the sun and block off the warmth while you're laid back in your favorite lawn chair. The kind of cloud that makes you feel a little chilled for a moment. Or, sometimes gives you relief from the blazing hot sun. You look up to see if the clouds are moving because all you want is that direct sunlight to come back and you try to guess how long those clouds will stick around. You make a decision about whether or not you're going to stay in that chair based on the movement of those clouds. 

 

Yeah, that's how I'm feeling today after spending a wonderful, perfectly sunny week with my kids. The mental clouds have been coming and going since we dropped them off at the airport early yesterday morning. Thank goodness I had plans on my calendar yesterday so I had something to look forward to and take my mind off how quiet and empty my house felt once they were gone.  Which, I realize, is a silly statement as I write it. There is nothing quiet or empty about my house. I just miss them. Terribly.

 

I'm going to get on with my day now but I needed to write. I haven't written in a lot of days. I've been on vacation. I've slept in, eaten bacon and peppermint ice cream. I've watched movies and talked and listened. I've hugged and loved on my kids as much as they'd let me for an entire week. I believe I asked them every question I've kept to myself since the last time I saw them two years ago. I ran out of questions just as it was time for them to travel home.

 

I'll snap out of it. I'm going to get out of the lawn chair now and mow the lawn. I'm going to brush my dogs and cut my husband's hair. I'm going to find a dress to wear to an event we're attending next weekend. I'm going to get on with my life. I don't like it here in under the clouds so I'm going to move.

 

love, susan

 

 

Respond Si Vous Plait

RSVP = Respond si vous plait.

Does anyone know what this means any longer?  

It means, please get back to me. Let me know your intentions. I need to make plans and it is important to me to count you in or out.

Recently a friend assisted another friend in planning an event. She was genuinely surprised at the number of people who responded that they would, in fact, be attending and then didn't show up. I was not surprised.  She said they ended up with a lot of leftover food. It happens.

When I lived in Arizona, I was taught lovingly by my wonderful Mexican friends that only white people ask for an RSVP.  In the Mexican culture, they put a verbal invitation out there and you either go or you don't. They make enough food and room for whoever shows up and they don't spend time worrying about whether or not Jane Doe shows up. If Jane doesn't show up, she must have had something else going on. No big deal. They don't get mad at her. They don't shun her.  They don't take her off the invite list.  It always works out. I love this system.

How many to invite?
Now personally, I love being inclusive. I'd invite the entire world to my party ... if I was having one. I'd make a homemade card, hand-write your name and address and put a pretty stamp on it. I wouldn't ask you to commit ... I'd just hope that you had so much fun at my last party that you'd make time to come again. But I wouldn't want you to feel bad if you RSVP'd that you were coming and something came up and you couldn't come. We've got enough things in this world to feel bad about. So, I might leave the rsvp off my invites. Go random. Throw the invite out there and see what happens. I'd even go so far to say, BRING A FRIEND!  I love surprises!

When is an RSVP a good idea?

I don't know. I suppose there are times when RSVP's are important. If I'm paying a caterer $25 a plate for a sit-down dinner for a wedding reception, I need to know if you are coming.  CONFESSION:  I once RSVP'd to a reception and at the last minute we decided not to go, for whatever lame reason. Our friends were not very happy with us. That was 20+ years ago and I still feel bad about it. I just didn't understand the whole RSVP thing.  Today I do, which is why I think long and hard before I say yes to an RSVP. As a matter of fact, we RSVP'd to a 50th wedding anniversary party in July. We're traveling 200 miles to get there. I'm actually glad there was a request to respond. I am the kind of person who will show up if I say I'm going to show up so I sat on the request for a couple weeks. I can hardly wait for that one.
 

My questions to you are: 

What kinds of events should we be asking for an RSVP? 
Do you say yes when you really want to say no, and then just don't show up?
Do you ever host parties?
Do you worry about whether or not you should have people RSVP?
Have you ever flaked out after saying yes to a party?

I'd love to hear your take on this topic.

love, susan

Deep Thoughts From a Blonde Chick

To fill the hour -- that is happiness.  ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

 

I'm afraid I am still on a pink cloud over events of the last two weekends. That beautiful wedding I attended over a week ago and the solstice ride we took on Saturday have left me brimming with good feelings, better than any drug or box of cheap wine could accomplish. I have a big event coming up this weekend that I have not allowed myself to think too much about. I'm funny that way.

 

You see, I'm a former future tripper. I used to sit in constant anticipation of what would happen in my future. Events and people would always often fall short of my expectations. It is only when I stop anticipating how things are going to turn out, that I find the greatest joy in the most minute details of life's adventures.

I love Emerson's quote here. I get it. You know why? Because I used to always have my mind in the future. I would be so wrapped up in what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, next year that I could not possibly enjoy one moment of today.

My son and his wife will be arriving on Saturday to visit for an entire week. To say I'm excited would be a ridiculous understatement. I am thrilled to pieces. However, between now and then, I've got five beautiful days lined up to work, walk the dogs, meet with friends, write a letter to my pen pal, and everyday life stuff that more than likely will keep me on that pink cloud.

Last night, I cooked up a beautiful pan of chicken Thai rice and put together some chicken dishes to freeze for lunch this week. I brushed my dogs and read a little before I went to sleep. I love my life and all the things that fill the hours.

Think about it. Do you feel like what you are doing is filling your hours with happiness?  What little things fill up your time?  Tell me!

love, susan

Solstice Ride ~ 404 Miles Through Oregon's Back Roads

We logged 404 miles yesterday on what was probably the most scenic route we've ever taken on Oregon's Scenic Biways. Even with the slight disappointment of not  making it all the way to Anthony Lakes due to snow on the road, we came damn close and that was good enough for us.

 

It's all about the journey,

not the destination.

 

Leaving by 9:00am, we traveled back roads the entire day, never cruising much above 50 mph. All roads were new to each of us. Even though the events of the day will soon be overshadowed by new adventures, I hope my documentation will be good enough to remember the highlights.

 

First of all, our road captain seemed to be plagued by birds. I was riding directly behind him when a pheasant swooped across the road in front of him. I don't know how he didn't hit it but it wouldn't be the only near-miss. My mind wandered a bit thinking about what it would have been like had that bird come flying over the top of his windshield directly into my path.  PLOMP. It could have been ugly.

 

On the next leg of the trip, a red-tailed hawk came out of nowhere and descended upon Dougie with his talons stretched out as if it was was going to attack our captain's orange motorcycle. Just as it almost lighted on him, the bird retreated. Weirdest thing I have ever seen in my miles of riding.

 

Ukiah: We stopped for a good lunch and great banter with a seasoned waitress. What a great little place to rest. It is a tiny little blip on the map but there is a lot of traffic and it was good old-fashioned fun watching the locals. We sat there freezing due to the climb in elevation but I saw locals in shorts and even a shirtless guy. It's all relative.

 

 We discovered they have gas there! This is a big deal for a girl who has a tank that is smaller than the rest. I'm honored these guys let me ride with them as I am a horrible worrier about where my next gas fill-up is going to be. I know in my heart-of-hearts that our Marine friend (Semper Fi!), would never leave me behind but what a pain in the ass it would be to have to go find gas in the middle of nowhere. That's all I'm saying, dear Doug. 

 

After lunch, we headed towards Anthony Lakes. We never made it to the lakes as you can see there was still snow on the road. If there is such a thing as fate, I believed in it this day as we had to back track and travel on forest road #51 to get to La Grande. If not for the snow, we would have missed it and that would have been a shame. 

 

We saw buffalo and a couple getting married out in the middle of nowhere. The road is a bit rough in places but nothing that would prevent me from wanting to travel it again. The entire stretch (I'm guessing 40 miles?) we saw only one car. Loved that.

 

We were gone 11 hours. What an awesome way to spend June 21st ... the longest day of the year.

 

What did you do on solstice?

 

love, susan

 

BONUS:

For any riders in the area, this is my best rough guesstimate of our route:

I82 --> I84

I84 --> 207 south Lexington

207 --> 74 Heppner

207 --> few miles south, left on 53

53 --> Ukiah and SE on 52

52 --> 73 East to Anthony Lakes (almost)

73 --> 54 --> 51

51 --> North of Starkey to Hwy 244

244 --> I84 15 miles north of La Grande

 

The last great back-road we traveled was the old Oregon trail, which parallels Cabbage Hill and is open range. We've always wanted to travel that road and it was well worth the wait.

I Need Therapy

Zucchini or cucumber?

For having a black thumb, things are starting to bloom at my place and I love it.

 

Gardening is my least favorite thing to do. I pretty much suck at it. However, I am still trying to do a little of it every summer because I do enjoy the process.  Those summers when I have elected not to garden, I always regret it. It's kind of like when someone at work orders Tupperware and I decide to not order and then I'm super envious when the order comes in and I am sitting there empty-handed.  I need a shrink, I know.

 

Well, that's how it is with gardening. I don't want to be empty-handed when fall rolls around and everyone around me is showing off the fruits of their labor, not that I'll have a whole lot to show off.

 

Cucumber or zucchini?

I'm such a bad gardener that I don't even know what I have growing besides the tomatoes and peppers. I think this might be a cucumber but I would not bet my life on it. What is wrong with me? 

 

I had a therapist/friend once who said that you can tell a lot about a person by looking at their garden.  I say, you went to school for 6 years to come up with that diagnoses?  Really?  (insert crazy Jack Nicholson laugh here) Obviously, her words resonated something in me because of all the things I could remember about her, this is the one thing that stands out. Yes, Rose, I'm a little disorganized in the gardening department. Commit me, please. I could use the rest. They let you read books in the mental institution, don't they?

 

I'm just making a little fun of myself this morning. It's Friday. It has been a very long week and I just want to stay home and watch my mystery garden grow. Is that crazy?

love, susan

Cloud Nine

The sun set in a fiery blaze of pink-almost-red last night. I shot this Sunday eve  from the home of friends who were married on Saturday as I delivered DVD's from their wedding.

 

I'm no wedding photographer, that's for sure. But I loved that our friends trusted me to do the best job possible.  They will never know how much it meant to me. To see their beautiful day unfold through my lens was emotional for me.  

 

I arrived early so as to relieve any doubt that I would show up. Wedding days are stressful as there are so many balls up in the air. This day was produced and choreographed by close friends and family. The flowers, the cake, the decorations, the little girls' hair, the table setup, the music, the ceremony, the photos, the food ... all done by people who love J & J. Nothing was left undone and it was a beautiful gathering of smiling, wonderful people.

 

The difficult part of getting images was the bright sun and high stress. Looking through my lens I could see the wrinkled furrow on each of their brows. I had no idea how much it showed until their friend and minister-for-a-day announced them as husband and wife and directed them around to the audience of family and friends.  There is that moment when I saw "ahhhh, we did it"!  And then the photos changed.

 

I saw my old friends. Relaxed. Comfortable. In love.

 

It was a purely joyful day and I hope I'll remember the feeling of being with family. I hope I remember the beautiful smiles, the hugs and kisses, the visiting, the feeling that everything is right in the world.

 

.... I'm still on cloud nine.  Let me be.

 

love, susan

 

Remi Dog Walking

Fuzzy picture, I know. We were walking!

 

This story is a bit of miracle I must share with you.  If you've never had a dog that pulls when you walk, you probably won't appreciate this post.

 

We adopted Remi a little over a year ago. She had terrible separation anxiety and she is quite bitchy at times. The problem is, she can be the sweetest dog I've ever had on my lap. She is smart and entertaining.  And, challenging.

 

I love smart, entertaining, challenging dogs. And, men.

 

Over the winter, I took her to a couple of classes to see about getting her Good Canine Citizen's title. We didn't finish the class.  To get her in the truck and across the parking lot was a) embarrassing, and b) exhausting.  This dog was is crazy. When I'd put a leash on her, she would pull so hard I swear she could pull a dog sled. Perhaps she has a little husky in her.

 

Recently I ran across a blog written by a woman who has 5 dogs. She is also a trainer and one of her posts addressed our problem. She suggested a few things I had not tried.  I'm not a quitter.  I already had a harness. I have hot dogs. I even have a clicker (one of those cricket sounding toys you get from the dollar store).  I set out a little over a month ago with my tricks in hand. If I could just get around the block without her pulling my arm out of the socket I promised myself and her that I would get up every day and take her walking.

 

IT WORKED!!!!!  

 

I am happy to report that for a couple of weeks now we have been walking around just one block. The trick to dog training is to go steady but don't skip ahead too fast or you might lose your dog's interest.

 

This week, I decided to skip ahead and today we completed our second 2 mile walk. Am I happy?  Yes!

 

Have you had a great success recently?  Tell me about it!

 

love, susan